What hallucinations / delusions / paranoid thoughts have your bipolar caused you to see / hear / experience in the past? I was recently diagnosed and want to know what kinds of things I might experience. So far, I’ve mostly heard about bipolar folk “experiencing” things related to religion or the government.
#BipolarDisorder #Hallucinations #Delusions #ParanoidThoughts
Hi everyone! My name is Dawn and I'm new here. I'd love to share stories with you. #BipolarDisorder #Anxiety #Depression #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #PTSD #ParanoidThoughts
TW: self harm, sexual abuse
How do I know if I’m bipolar 1 or not?
I can’t figure out which type of bipolar I am. My mother basically just told me I was bipolar two so I always just went with that and my old psychiatrist said so as well but they were friends so my mom had a strong influence there and my mom did not want me to be BP 1.
Although, in the past when I would get manic, I would get delusional, have visual and auditory hallucinations, have intense paranoia etc. Although, the hallucinations were typically when I was doing drugs (whether I was high or not but around that time period of my life) or not sleeping for extended periods. The delusions and paranoia are kinda constant. I never really thought of my ideologies as delusions until my current occupation in the mental health field.
My delusions typically center on strange spiritual ideas. Mostly it’s just paranoia when I’m taking my meds and stable. I used to self harm when manic/mixed, my manic episodes were pretty extreme, I’d spend hundreds of dollars, I think I spent at least a couple thousand in two weeks once? Bad reckless driving, pressured speech, very very very bad promiscuity and putting myself into dangerous situations, I was raped while manic, I was partially hospitalized for a month, etc etc. Oh and I often have a very strong god complex especially when manic. #BipolarDisorder #Bipolar2Disorder #Bipolar1Disorder #Psychosis #ParanoidThoughts
About the COVID thing . It makes my mental health worse. Struggling with this but then again I am going to pray& believe we won’t have to get it & we are better off continuing doing what we have to to protect ourselves & others.! My fam& I shouldn’t have to put in a stressful state of mind worrying that there may be mandate. No body knows here in mn . It’s unpredictable. I will not live in fear over this. My family & I take all the proper precautions about protecting ourselves from not only COVID but other illnesses by wearing a mask 😷 in public places ( pull down mask when other ppl are 6’ or more away from us ) . Pro COVID ppl ( ***that are aholes abt it *****) . I am going to msg my dr abt this too besides the fact I take lithium & Xanax n I highly suspect those meds will not go well with that poisonous ☠️ cocktail ( that’s what it means to me ) . U do u . Me and my (COVID)unvaccinated fam are very healthy . I practice and study 📖 traditional medicine ( yoga, tai chi, certain foods/ herbs 🌿, massage , acupuncture , acupressure, natural things cbd, hemp to name some)
#Hypomania #Bipolar1Disorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Anxiety #PTSD #naturalmedicine #ParanoidThoughts
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Alone. Paranoid. Trauma. Nightmares can’t sleep. No friend. Did I deserve this from him? I stayed I could’ve left before things got worse. I got into bed with him. I never thought back. I live in a hole. They say they will check up on me. It’s been 9 weeks. I’m forgotten, my skin doesn’t feel the same anymore. I stayed and I started realizing he was awful. My throat and body still hurts. I never left. Why call me a victim? #PTSD #Anxiety #AnxietyAttack #MeToo #ParanoidThoughts #PanicAttacks #PanicAttack #SexualAbuseSurvivors #SexualAbuse #SexualAssault #SexualAssaultSurvivors #SexualTrauma #Nightmares #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #worry #Abuse #AbuseSurvivors #DomesticAbuse #DomesticAbuseSurvivors
sometimes your mind can be your worst enemy, being lost in your thoughts can change the mood of your day-to-day lives also can lead to very tragic events. I'm slowly coming out of this dark place. I have hope now, learning who i am as a person. My kind heart, sweet soul, personal health issues will never change the fact that I am beautiful, I am loved by the most important people in my life "My children". I can make it, I can keep fighting ❤ we all can make it, we all can keep fighting ❤ 💪 staying strong, loving yourself for who you are. Believing in yourself, knowing that it's ok to be different, it's ok to not fit in, its ok to be yourself and love every bone in your body. And sometimes it's ok to NOT be OK! I'm trying 😪 and I will make it 😇 #StayStrong #StayEncouraged #Selflove
#SchizophreniaSpectrumPsychoticDisorders . I wonder if there is a group for paranoia on here. I wish I could better cope with the things I hear people say about me when I’m in public. Resperidone helps, but there is a lot of remaining delusions and auditory hallucinations that I can deal with when I’m feeling good, but make me angry sometimes when I’m surprised by them or I’m already tired or in a low mood. I am a very kind person and would never hurt anyone, but I’m hard on myself. I haven’t seen much on here about paranoia, but I would love to know how people can deal with this day in and day out. Dwight.
From the last one week my "vicious phase" has started again. I have been feeling depressed, anxious, numb, sad, and guilty all at once. Once again. My routine has worsened. It's the worst one I have experienced so far. Even after taking my sleeping pill at 9 p.m. I can't sleep until 3-4 a.m. and then when I sleep I'm not aware of even the loudest sound for the next 8 hours. But the time has extended. I sleep for more than 8 hours. Till 12-13 p.m. eventually waking up tired and exhausted. My motivation, positivity, optimism has hit rock bottom. There's no discipline in my life right now. I'm eating only one meal and that too not a proper one. I'm not able to stay active at all. I lie in my bed all day long. Not being able to exercise is giving me a huge amount of guilt. Very huge. And I can't cope with that. I feel like binge eating, like just stuffing the food in my mouth ( but thanks to the lockdown. I'm not able to binge eat because the fast food shops are all closed) and then as soon as I get the idea of my stomach being full I feel like puking, I feel guilty. Guilty for not working out which I should be doing to reduce my weight and control PCOD and also stay active and thinking about binge eating, not following my diet. The guilt is really huge.
This phase is literally snatching away literature from me. It has happened before. My mind attacks the things I love to do or I love. And literature is it's favourite thing to snatch. I'm looking at my novels and all I feel is numb. Usually I feel happy looking at them, thinking of all the wonderful things written in them. But right now even reading a book is frustrating me. I just keep lying down in my bed or sitting and I keep staring out of the window. It's windy here. I like that kind of weather but due to my phase I'm not able to enjoy that too. I look outside and feel nothing. It's the weather I like and I can't even enjoy it. I love coffee and right now I'm just drinking it without feeling the peace I used to feel while drinking coffee.
All I feel is numb, anxious, depressed, negative. So much is going on in my mind and I can't control it. So many negative thoughts have settled down in here and I'm confused beyond confused. I can't feel love, comfort, and peace. All I feel is negativeness, huge guilt, tired, exhausted, uselessness, unworthy, irresponsible. I want this phase of my vicious cycle to end as soon as it can. I don't know how to do it. It has never lasted this long. And it has never been so exhausting. It's the worst. And the saddest part is, I'm not able to do anything, anything to help myself.
If anyone of you knows what I can do, please tell.
#Depression #Anxiety #numb #negative #MentalHealth #Guilt #tired #sad #depressed #anxious #ParanoidThoughts #Suicide #help #SuicidalIdeation #SuicidalThoughts #MentalHealthHero #MentalHealthAwareness #Awareness #Therapy #psychologist #Psychiatrist #Counseling #TheMighty
So as time has gone on, my curiousity has gotten the better of me and i started reading tags in public places. I noticed atleast one gang tag thats come up frequently in town, its been worrying me but i try not to place any value judgements on it. Ive been taking peer classes and have been going through gender transition through it all aswell. Ive been feeling more an more threatened, I bought a couple EDCs i carry with me everywhere to feel a little safer. My brain has been cycling through stress and anxiety all through this,my head feels like its been caught in a vice. Ive also been having a lot of trouble remembering to take my meds because of all the stress. I keep feeling like im skirting a relapse, and id be open to any suggestions as to how to prevent this. I always go an take my meds as soon as i can remember,but its spotty,i have reminders on my phone but they dont always work,i use the medisafe app. Im having a difficult time seeing around the wall of paranoia, everything with me keeps getting blown out of proportion it seems. Im just at a loss right now as to how to keep up with my meds. Or calm my anxieties, i do breathing sometimes but my mind doesnt want to let go. I try to logic my way out of it but my head is so foggy from stress i cant reason well. Just at a loss right now. Any ideas would be appreciated
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