Disorder

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Disorder
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    Depressed & Negative Thoughts

    Depression can be dangerous and life-threatning. Try to keep yourself away from drowning in it.

    I thought I could over come the depression in my mind but it seems it never went away from me at all. I don't know how much more i can bear, how much I can live with it, but scares me a lot from inside. At times it starts to give a feeling that this is the end for you now. I am just 32, i don't know why I get these thoughts. I can't overcome the old mis-happenings from my mind. I'm unable to distract myself even if I don't it only happens for a few minutes and again starts to think of something or the other.

    A couple of years back my parents were influenced by my elder brother and they asked me to leave the house. Since, childhood I have been bullied, ignored by all my family and he used to get all the pamper and everything was given to him. Since then, I have been just living alone even staying with the parents. I married to my girlfriend in 2016, things were quite fine in the initial days/months i would say but I think we are complete stranges at times.

    I have fallen a lot but never stopped and tried to make me strong from outside because I don't want anyone to know how I feel from inside. Also, i have no one in my life who will understand my feelings. I have been like this negative since childhood. One day, my wife pointed fingure at me saying that I am the reason for her depression. This happened a couple of months ago but its still in my heart and doesn't go out. I mean I don't understand. When I am already pissed off from my life, now i made her life miserable.

    Sometimes, I feel like divorce and leaving everything and go away from here. Somewhere very far and unknown place and start a new life maybe but there's something inside which keeps stopping me to act.

    Things which I deserve, if I don't get them I get depressed. I am from India, I was given multiple opportunities to go to the UK, US, but I don't know if it's my bad luck or what. Something or the other happens or becomes big stone in my path which i couldn't control and I couldn't go. Now, I have plans to go to Singapore, but due to covid I am stuck from last almost 2 years now.

    I don't know how much or till when I'll be able to handle such pressure on me.

    #Depression #SuicidalThoughts #NegativeThoughts #Disorder #MentalHealth

    5 people are talking about this
    Community Voices

    Selfie Sunday

    <p>Selfie Sunday</p>
    Community Voices

    A little funny for you all.

    <p>A little funny for you all.</p>
    7 people are talking about this
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    I'm conflicted, please #help me out with this? #personality #Disorder or #psychotic #illness

    So, recently I had an appointment with my new doctor who got rid of the potential diagnosis of #BPD on my file and said that it was more likely to be a #psychotic illness... BUT could he be wrong? My mum reckons that he's more experienced than the doctors I had before as he had to come out of retirement due to shortages and cuts. I would appreciate it if someone with with either of these diagnoses could message me x

    2 people are talking about this
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    Community Voices
    Community Voices

    Just thoughts

    Do you ever think that state you r in now/disorder/feeling is not necessarily bc situations you survived, people that abuse you or traumas but like any other desease, like you catch a virus or got an infection?
    #Depression #Anxiety #PTSD #CPTSD #MentalHealth #Disorder #Trauma

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    Never come back home? #Depression #Disorder #MentalHealth

    Have you ever thought of not going back to your home when you leave your house for some reason be-it any work related or maybe buy grocery or went out on a walk etc. Anything at all.
    What's that feeling like. Because I have been getting this feeling from a few months now. It feels like I should never go back to my apartment but situation is like I have no other choice. I don't get some peaceful time alone anymore.

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    Just "Take it easy" they say.

    <p>Just "Take it easy" they say.</p>
    2 people are talking about this