It’s true 😮💨
By no means am I blaming football for my mental health problems. I have fond memories of playing sport and being part of a team/organisation. I was gifted with the ball and excelled on the pitch.
It was my father who ruined my experience. It was not enough for my father to simply appreciate that his son was capable of running, jumping and kicking a ball. He brought along a competitive spirit that was not only embarrassing but toxic.
I was skillful but I was not a naturally gifted athlete with any attributes that made me excel far beyond my years. I was playing in the year above and starting in the team but again this was not enough for my father who expected me to excel in the squad. I lacked in stature and athletic ability (speed mostly) and this would eventually lead to difficulties towards the end of my playing days.
If I ever get around to having kids, I will think long and hard before enrolling them in to a competitive sport / environment. The problem with competitive sport is it breeds a mindset based on results. The schooling system is also guilty of this. I would like this post to focus on the issue of sports although I also experienced major issues at school.
There is an argument for competitive sport but my overall consensus is it did me more harm than good. The need to be the best always critiquing how I played, never being satisfied and the game forever playing on my mind. For something that gave me very little it is very taxing on the psyche.
My team disbanded and I was forced to join a new team in a more difficult league for which I was not prepared. The game was no longer fun and became serious business with everyone trying to make it to the senior squad where money was involved.
It was a combination of life getting in the way of my dream of becoming a footballer and my own poor life choices. It takes a very strong willed individual to ignore the lights, girls & music and focus solely on the game. You need to be wiling to sacrifice for the sport. When I gave up on football, I started to experience identity issues as I felt the game made me who I was.
My dad only wanted the best for me, so when I started to act out and started to steal it was a shock to him and he didn't know how to handle my behaviour.
It wasn't until I stopped playing football and realised that the game had left me feeling empty and took a lot away from me. It also left me with a competitive streak that I sought to satisfy elsewhere. I felt deep sadness that my own stupid decisions had ruined my dream of becoming a footballer.
In my later years I have trouble agreeing to be part of a team, group or association. Football is not the sole reason for this but adds to my mental problems associated with gang mentality. It also brings out an us against them mentality which I don't want anything to do with. Keeping to myself has brought on its own challenges and I fight with negative emotions most of the time as I come to terms with who I am.
#self #Myself #Individual #Fear #solely #Responsible #scared #groups #people #Smoking #Drugs #Addiction #Drinking #gangs #ME #Sport #cutthroat #toxicmasculinity #goingout #lights #Music #Addiction #Depression #isolated #nobody #bymyself #Girls #Identity #competition #NotGoodEnough #best #First #winning #Success #failure #defeat #bottom #Fights #Life #Death #alone
Tonight I began to accomplish a task that I never thought was possible. Having the reassurance and comfort of a loved one certainly helps. Whether you are accomplishing a small task or a large one, celebrate the little victories. Be proud of yourself. Be proud of the steps you took. Especially as an abuse survivor, I feel especially proud. After being hurt and put down for so long, I can now be proud of myself. Even if it's something small. So pat yourself on the back and keep going! Celebrate!
“Success is not Final;
Failure is not Fatal;
It is the courage to continue that counts.
What does this mean to you? Who feels like that from time to time? I know I do. Just because you have a bad apple does not mean it’s going to rot. It just means you have to try harder and there is NOTHING wrong with that. #Disability #Positivity #Success
If you can never truly let go of what’s already done, then you aren’t allowing yourself to have a better present or a better future. What we deserve and truly desire in this life is true happiness. To truly be happy is to accept where you are at the time being, and believing that the choices or mistakes you made were made for a reason. For the years that I allowed myself to live in misery because I was stuck in the past, I truly look back on now and wonder why I wasted all that time. When I finally let go of the past, was the exact moment I felt life gave me another chance. One of the easiest yet hardest concepts to grasp I finally learned. For all the years I kept walking through the same cycle, the same old doors stayed open. When I finally learned to let go and accept my circumstances and situations for what it was, the new doors were finally opened to things and people I never imagined possible.
#Inspiration #Selfcare #Selflove #MorningRoutine #Success
#Success #love #doing #learning #quote
🗣 - "Taylor Lakhryst was an undecided voter who participated in a #CBC program called Face to Face during last year's federal election campaign. While being on the show gave her a chance to ask questions of a party leader, she felt CBC's production choices spoiled the experience by making her appear inept and powerless."
❓ - What's #DwhellOnIt ?
👀 - Dwhell On It is a series where I answer your questions about my lived experience as a #trans woman!
📺 - A new episode gets uploaded every week! - https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLr2CrTrMJaIzM7ETpDxpMcGHhJ1TPxPq4
‼️ - Get engaged!
✉️ - #Comment w/ thoughts & questions!
👍🏻 - Please like & #Share !
🔖 - Bookmarks!
"While you expressed #Gratitude for the #Opportunity to provide visibility on the subject of abuse toward the 2SLBGTQIA+ #Community , you felt that #CBC made choices which diluted your appearance. It left you feeling, if not misrepresented, then underrepresented."
It feels as if #CBC chose to represent me as what I interpret as inept, powerless, and stuck with candy-coated concerns because who I am isn't palatable enough for Canadians who can't cope that #people such as myself strive to inspire and create #change .
#social platforms highlighted my segment as being of the utmost importance on an issue that had not been placed front and centre in the campaign until my appearance.
I continued to focus much of my argument on the treatment of my introductory video. I emphasized how problematic it was that this video highlighted "my love for #Sports and karaoke" while omitting more substantive #Comments about the importance of placing responsibility for bigotry and hate-based abuse on the abusers rather than the victims.
"I'm an undecided voter because" and "Let's be #leaders …" were extracted from two completely different sections of what I provided. #CBC created that line and not me, and I'm not sure if that is conducive to "accuracy."
"You stated that you followed all the directives given to you in advance by producers, yet you were the only one of the four participants given less than 40 seconds of airtime."
#CBC watered me down and presented me with the safest, most palatable and most comfortable image they could build based on the information I provided.
"Your complaint is, first and foremost, a reminder that the stories journalists tell are not really "theirs." They are the stories of real #people with real lives, ambitions, and concerns."
Journalistic Standards and Practices covers much ground regarding ethical #Journalism but doesn't cover specific circumstances.
"There is more debate to be had about editing your introductory video … it's clear that those producers took two risks with your video."
"On your frustration that the #question you asked on the show was "negotiated," … I worried it meant that programmers were forcing you to ask the questions that they wanted."
🔗 - Links!
How Presentation Affects Representation - tinyurl.com/yc26c89x
Your Friends Appreciate a Random Check-In Call or Text More Than You Realize - tinyurl.com/3hbad7au
👀 - Create #change !
📣 - End anti-2SLGBTQIA+ abuse! - act.newmode.net/action/hirewheller/csr
📣 - You can #help ! Everything inspiring HireWheller stays ongoing - biased systems, ignorant platforms, violent abusers & isolated victims.
💻 - Connect!
#Twitter : https://twitter.com/HireWheller?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
👱🏼♀️ - Look me up!
TaylorLakhryst: #Transgender woman, advocate, INFJ, ♊️, she/her/hers 🏳️⚧️
📒 - Alt information
* Text: Dwhell on it w/ Taylor Lakhryst Ep. 56 - How Presentation Affects Representation - HIREWHELLER
* Description: A blonde woman wearing a black sweater is smiling & sitting in front of a beige wall. There is white text with a yellow & purple accent.
* Captions: Automated
#Gratitude #Opportunity #social #Sports #Comments #leaders #canadian #gender #grateful #interview #manitoba #News #Out #Respect #Safety #Success #winnipeg #Youtube #active #Activism #Anxiety #athlete #Business #causes #Charity #donate #Energy #equality #Fundraising #Lesbian #LGBT #LGBTQ #Kindness #marketing #Media #nonbinary #philanthropy #Pride
I got a promotion on Monday. I’ve been overwhelmed since last year. I’m dreading being even more overwhelmed as I continue in this new role.
Every time that I take on more or earn new roles, I struggle. I talk to myself like I’m worthless. I treat myself badly and slip down this hole. I used to escape with suicide attempts and hospital stays. I don’t want to do that anymore.
This time, I’m looking to be a better friend to myself. I’m going to be kind and gracious, understanding and patient. All of the things that I aim to be with my staff, I will be with myself.
I can do this. I will be all of the things I want to be. I will be successful and gracious, kind and patient, understanding of myself and others. I can do it. I can do it! #BipolarDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Success #promotion #growth #betterment #Selflove #Selfcare #Kindness
"Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if one only remembers to turn on the light."
#beingtherapy #Happiness #wellness #MentalHealth #torontotherapist #Ontario #Toronto #selfcare #Mindfulness #counselling #Healing #goals #Motivation #Success #mindset #Inspiration #trackyourgoals #YouCanDoIt #Positivity #possitivemindset