chronicstress

My entire life, fear has been my fuel.

Fear is what got me to move.

To try.

To show up.

To perform.

To be “good.”

To keep people close.

To keep myself alive.

I didn’t get things done because I believed in myself.

I got things done because I was afraid of what would happen if I didn’t.

Fear of being judged.

Fear of failing.

Fear of being too much.

Fear of not being enough.

Fear of being left.

Fear of being seen.

Fear of not being seen.

Fear was my heartbeat.

And now?

It’s gone.

The engine that kept me going for years just… broke.

Stopped.

Shut down.

And I’m left sitting in a quiet that doesn’t feel peaceful.

It feels hollow.

I don’t feel motivated.

I don’t feel inspired.

I don’t feel ambitious.

I don’t feel excited.

I don’t feel anything pulling me or pushing me.

It’s not numb like “I don’t care.”

It’s numb like I don’t have any fuel left to care with.

Like the part of me that used to function, simply… doesn’t.

And I have to face the truth:

I don’t know how to move without fear.

I don’t know who I am without fear.

If I’m not running, then what?

If I’m not fighting, then who am I?

If I’m not trying to survive, then what the hell do I do with myself?

This is not laziness.

This is not giving up.

This is not me being dramatic.

This is collapse.

This is the body saying:

“I cannot keep living like this.

Not like that.”

And it’s terrifying because I don’t have a replacement system yet.

I don’t know how to be a person who moves toward things instead of away from them.

I don’t know how to want things because they feel good, not because I’m afraid of the consequences.

I’m stuck in this strange dead-space between who I’ve been and whoever I’m supposed to become.

And it feels like floating in darkness with no map, no promise, no spark.

But here’s the thing I’m holding onto:

The collapse means the old system is gone.

And the old system needed to die.

Fear kept me alive.

But I deserve something better than survival.

So I’m learning to notice the tiniest things that don’t demand anything from me:

A dog breathing against my leg.

A song that doesn’t hurt.

Warm water.

A quiet corner where no one needs anything from me.

I don’t know where this is going yet.

I don’t have a plan.

I don’t have answers.

But I’m here.

Raw.

Stripped.

Starting over.

If you’re here too

floating in this terrifying nowhere

you’re not alone.

#CPTSD #traumasurvivor #Burnout #NervousSystemHealing #SurvivalMode #chronicstress #Emotionalexhaustion #restisrecovery #IdentityAfterTrauma #FeelingEmpty #startingover

#Healing #journey #Health #wellness #Love

So ok here’s the thing now that we have been putting in the work we are starting to see the results.

Work check list: DBT CBT ACT Mindfulness EMDR MSRT Chronic Pain Therapy soon more.

Yes IT is a journey from where you are to where you can be.

Just believe just begging 🙏 start self healing ❤️‍🩹 start with music crying laughing writing.

Listen to meditation 🧘‍♀️ sleep hypnosis or anything at night. Work through the resting embrace the resting the recovery ❤️‍🩹 Journey.

IT is so difficult we know the pain is so hard we know the fatigue is brutal we know the depression we know the anxiety we know the isolation we know the doubt we know.

We really know cause we have Lived Experience.

We know cause #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder cptsd

We know cause #chronicstress

We know cause
#ChronicPain

We know cause
#chronicfatiguesyndrome

We know cause
#Fibromyalgia

We know cause
#CovidLong

#Weknow

#WeInWe can beat this !

#YouCan beat this !

#yeswecan

We are all survivors we have all been through and or are going through.

Thank you God we are still here to cheer others on and to help inspire to carry them through.

We hope you knew we were close to death. We are alive and we are starting to thrive.

We would love to thank and congratulate #TheMighty Team you have blessed so many through this platform of healing support and love.

We have many reasons to be grateful and many more blessings to come.

We pray you yes you are ready cause you are reading this right now and you know we are #beatingthis we are #overcoming and #YesYouCan too.

Make the choice to choose your present 💝

We can only point to our walk our #livedexperience take the time to heal. You can heal.

We are all here you are not alone. You are worthy. You are important. You matter. You are valued.

Please be safe be well be loved 🥰 your worthy!

Don’t forget IT

#jw

The days i can deal are getting less and less. Im so tired.
#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #complextrauma #tion #PTSD #ChronicDepression #chronicstress #ChronicAnxiety #SocialAnxiety #Selfharm #self -image #dissociativedisorders #dontgiveafuck #BadDay #badweek #badmonth #badyear #justtonameafew