helpme

I am tired of living this way. The chronic suicidal ideations and loneliness. Feeling empty and not having a strong identity. The constant ups and downs - struggling to manage my emotions. The intensity of my emotions is debilitating. The loss of people in my life. An inability to make friends and be forever doomed for loneliness. Wanting to kill myself almost daily. Being in therapy for 15 years and only marginally making improvements. I can’t live like this anymore. My current therapist of 3 years suddenly insists I need antidepressants to manage my extreme depression and sudden extreme happiness. I disagree. How will pills solve what’s fundamentally broken? Only death will. I’m tired of living like this. I can’t. How can I find bpd specific help in Chicago area or virtually? Does anyone have any experience or recommendations for me ? I’m at my wits end. #BPD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #bpdhelp #helpme

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I'm LGBTQ+. I'm transmasc non-binary. I'm otherkin (not human). I'm Black. I have autism (please don't call my autism a disorder/disability/syndrome) and anxiety, and someone with trauma. I cry very easily. I am overweight. I am a part of a plural/collective. I am non-romantically polyamorous. And every damn day, I feel like this world called society is just here to for the sole purpose to shit on others, betray others, or just to secretly judge others, including me.

Every day, it is getting much harder and harder to believe that there is a single damn individual out there (other than my current therapist, all of my partners, my dad, and a few friends) who has common sense, is open-hearted, is open-minded, and doesn't like to discriminate or invalidate others for being different or for experiencing different things, or labeling themselves differently. Sometimes, the anxiety gets to the point where it seems like going out is stupid for me. What's the point?

It's like almost every damn community I've been a part of (and left) and witnessed just LOVES to INVALIDATE OTHERS SOMEHOW?! It's so annoying and stupid and it's just like... why can't you just fucking accept someone for who they are??? All of this just makes me so fucking angry and just...!!

...Sigh. Now that that's off my chest... may I ask for advice on how to go about this? I already currently seeing a therapist, luckily. Right now, it is very very hard for me to get off this mindset because I believe it's true, sadly.. this society and all of other individuals' opinions is tearing me apart..

#MyAutismIsNotADisorder #MentalHealth #helpme #Vent #venting #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #SocialAnxietyDisorder #anger #help #Society #Advice #triggerwarning #Neurodiversity #LGBTQIA #plural #otherkin

How does everyone combat the deafening loneliness? It feels like this dark abyss I have to actively try to push away. The second I let my brain relax or stop focusing on actively distracting myself, things start breaking down.

Also, what type of paranoid thoughts do you have and what age/time did you see these starting to begin?

#lonely #Bipolar2 #Paranoia #MentalHealth #helpme

I just found the afsp today, idk what to do but thx for having https://me.please help me i can't take much more.im a single mom of 4 adult kids my youngest Gabriel is 18,been dealing with so many different mental isses for so long that hes probably got a mental health disorder that noone knows about completely yet cuz its no joke taking care of him and i have basically and the same issues, therapist told me i need to take a break cuz im literally at that breaking point, so i guess im broken now just saying, cuz i feel of of my mind,stress and worry about hom and too many other emotions. But i cant take a break cuz im the only one that knows how to react or address his behaviors,hes such an angel and loves me his siblings, his one friend and our cats but theres something that takes over all the time and hes a different person. Hes never been diagnosed with multiple personalities but theres something different about his mental illness, but id like to know someonego throughthis but i have noone,i have one friend i talk to once A month, i stay home almost 24 7,im on disability for mental health and to much physical stuff to explain, im 48 ive been seing psychiatrist since i was 16 i was depressed and anorexic, im struggling with binge eating now,not the anorexia, im a fat pig and i hate myself for being disgusting anyway can anyone relate, im all alone,idk how to help h im m or if professionals somewhere can help. I cant afford a good psychiatrist, he sees the mental health clinic, hes fell through the cracks. I love my baby he needs me ti help him sorry so long but theres to much to explain it,much love and light to you all thx #helpme

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Why are these stupid fleas still here?? Our cat has a flea collar on and it’s been 50-60 degrees. It’s cold on my room, and the one or two 70 degree days we’ve had in fall (that or because of the rain, a gnat comes out only in my room! Summer already sucked because of these stupid pests and it seriously drove me mad, and I just want them gone already! I’ve literally sprayed and have light traps and everything!

The worst part is that it’s just in my room, no one elses. Our cat barely has gone in my room, not even for that long. She hasn’t been in there since a month ago..

And we got her in 2019! I thought that fleas would’ve stopped appearing after the first infestation but apparently not! I don’t know what to do. Summer already drove me crazy and mad and so angry. I’m so sick of this, I just want it to stop already… /vneg

Any advice?

#helpme #Autism #anger #feelinghelpless #Idontknowwhattodo

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Sometimes.. this house makes me want to die. I just want to be away from it already. Even if it’s just my older sister disagreeing with my decisions regarding garbage bags… I’m only throwing the garbage out often to keep flies and gnats away. I’m only tying them to keep them away. And for my mental health. To this freaking day, she still has a problem with it, and it’s very annoying, and honestly - it hurts 😕

I’m so sick of being anxious over hearing her kids - um - “teasing” - and annoying each other.

Not to mention the fact that because of my mother’s anxiety about the Illinois bonding law (when in reality, me and my dad knew that it wasn’t going to be as bad as it seemed - psa: please do your own research and don’t listen to others), she may or may not get the liscence to get a gun a few months from now. She already took the legal classes. She may not even get the gun in the first place, but it still feels very icky and uncomfortable and I don’t want my friends or partners (plural) being here dealing with that shit.

Things would be so much better if we weren’t living here right now.

I just want to be out of here already… it’s been three freaking years since we’ve planned to move out… but I hope it’ll be faster, especially after Dad heard about what Mom was doing. He doesn’t feel safe with me regarding her decision, and neither do I.

#SuicidalIdeation #helpme #Stress #Anxiety #Autism #frustrated