communication

I have an appointment coming up with my therapist. She was on leave so I haven't seen her in 5 weeks...a lot can happen in 5 weeks! I almost decided not to schedule with her again because I struggle with my words and feel like I waste her time. I realize one reason I feel that way is because almost every time I ask her how she is (at the beginning of a session) she answers with "busy." It makes me feel, well I don't know exactly. I guess it makes me feel like I'm wasting her busy time that she could be working with someone who doesn't struggle so much. Someone who doesn't fall back into the same issues as before. She's not the only one who says that to me, and I do wonder if I used to do that, when I was able to work and my kids were young. (I don't now, I despise the word.) I wish I had the nerve to tell her how much it bothers me, but am I making a big deal out of nothing? #Anxiety #Depression #Therapy #PTSD . #Communication

Every day we deal with a heap of grieve, shame and guilt.

We greatly appreciate our loved ones and partners. We truly do understand that our health isn't just hard for us to digest, process and accept but it is equally hard for them. They don't want to see their loved one in pain every day, struggling and going through treatment after treatment. It's emotionally heart breaking.

We feel like half the time we are a burden, as they press pause on their life to be there for us. This can be really hard on our self esteem and self worth as the guilt becomes overwhelming.

Yes we want support and are so thankful for all the support we have.

But we don't want our loved ones looking back with regret if they missed events, moments, adventures and opportunities to be there for us.

We want them to live as normal life as possible and enjoy life as they deserve too.

I know so many of our loved ones will tell us on a daily basis that our health is their top priority and they don't see it as a burden to them to look after, support and love us. This can sometimes make us feel guilty for feeling this way and questioning their support, but I think it's total natural to feel guilt and have that worry about their life in the back of our minds.

For me.. I've always said to friends and family LIVE, live double for me and you. Do everything you want to, can do and dream of doing.

Because it actually brings a smile to my face when I see them living and having fun. It weirdly gives me hope for life and that life can be beautiful and bring happiness along the journey.

Life really is rough and tough, it's not always kind and when you are battling a chronic or mental illness you do feel like you are living in a black hole! You can't see the end of the suffer or a light at the end of the tunnel. But it is SO important to keep hope in our hearts and have the love that we have around us to keep fighting but also love enables to see the glimmers of hope, it helps us feel a touch of happiness and love I truly do believe helps us break out of our comfort zones.

So what can we do to help relieve our guilt over our loved ones?

My advice would be to communicate.

Share how you are feeling in regards to the guilt about them not being able to live and you feeling like a burden.

But honest and open about you not wanting them to look back with regrets.

Air it all out and for sure they will gain a deeper understanding into where you are coming from and will be able to explain their side, which should but you at great ease.

But communication is really at the core.

Nobody ( although we would love to) can mind read.

As humans anyway we go through a range of emotions, thoughts and feelings minute by minute so that is why it's important to have regular chats and check in's.

The first chat you will have will always be the toughest but it does get easier as you build your confidence up and also feel more at ease. It can also help massively strengthen relationships too.

Have any of you felt guilt about your loved ones or partner not living out their life dreams because they are supporting you and your health journey?

#ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #LymeDisease #Relationships #MentalHealth #chronicillnesslife #Trauma #Communication #Support #healthsupport #chronicillnesssupport #spoonielife

With anxiety occasionally I’ll avoid things or confrontations, etc unpleasant things, or even procrastinate and so on. Does anyone have any tips to improve and or communicate better my needs or find some middle ground where everyone is happy instead of avoiding the situation in the first place? Mainly family related, but just in general want to improve on the area. Thanks!

#Anxiety #Communication #Wondering #thanks #appreciateit #selfImprovement #thanks #Trying #Depression

For me 2 weeks after a huge blowout… we r at least talking… small talk, nothing g real important, but talking at least! It makes me “scared” “happy” “cautious” “worried” but mostly “glad”! How about any of you? Hoping yours is more along the lines of “planning a trip together” “went out for a nice dinner” “cuddle on the couch” ….. tell me some good happy stories!! #marriageishard #Communication #ChronicIllness #Marriage

In what ways have you communicated to people close to u that u r in need of more support and been successful? Bc I have been doing this for over 20 years and no matter how hard I try or how fucking nice I am, they still don’t understand when I need help.

I’ve been out of work for 6 months or so (long story l, work didn’t know COVID, put pressure on us, we didn’t know COVID so it was hell trying to work then add on my brain). As I’m trying to get healthy again so I can get a job and such, I feel like everyone sees me differently. Since I don’t do much, I’m open, you can see me more clearly even if you have no idea what’s going on inside. My friend gets mad when I don’t answer the phone. It triggers panic attacks so I always have it on silent, nothing is different. She says my communication is off and that she’s not sure if she can tell me thinks because she’s not sure if I’ll be there. This hurts me greatly. I don’t do things like this on purpose. She texted me last night for a bit, all was fine. I took my night medicine and it doesn’t take that long to kick in. She called and texted me for homework help at midnight but my medicine got to me first. I’ll contact her tomorrow but it hurts to think I’m hurting someone from something that I have no control on. Health first.

Then the same for my family. They’re seeing more symptoms than they would when I’m at work most of the day. I keep telling everyone symptoms and how it effects me but it seems like im on a caroseul, spinning and spinning. All of this is not ready. It makes me feel intense anxiety to just exist in my body. I don’t want people mad at me. I’m human, too, but just need a little extra care. #Bipolar1Disorder #Communication #Anxiety #Stress #ADHD