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Intrusive Life

I’ve been MIA for what feels like months rather than days, but life has really been getting in my way lately. This has me thinking about how in terms of our mental health, intrusive thoughts get a lot of attention—but what of the grist of life that we cannot control just as easily? These are matters in which we can only control how we react to them, but in times of reduced physical capability, they can be quite overwhelming and difficult to deal with… and the world doesn’t make many accommodations for the sick.

In fact, I’ve found it to be quite the opposite. In that most people are more inclined to take advantage of my reduced capacity, than not. Family, friends, and foe alike.

If life is a battlefield; there aren’t many spare horses available to accommodate the wounded in the dailiness of living, so most of my friends and family have simply left me behind to fend for myself. So if nothing else, ableism has taught me that it is wears the same face as ageism, because our society has commodified people to the point that we are valued by how much energy we have to contribute, rather than the wisdom of experience we have to offer. I’ve also encountered a few illness groupies, who appear to delight in what I’ve come to think of as “sickness tourism” or “illness voyeurism.” It’s clear they aren’t so much there for me, so much as they show up for a taste of my drama, before moving on to the next crisis to feast on and nourish their saviour complexes.

And foes—well—being sick has given me a massive new enemy, given my healthcare system is less interested in helping me to get better, and more interested in telling me that I’m not gettting better because I AM the problem.

It also doesn’t help that my father passed away several years ago, and entrusted the care of his estate to a bank who have disregarded many of their fiduciary responsibilities so that after much effort on my part: I discovered that they committed a series of breaches, which I have had to escalate to the appropriate ombudsman. And as the oldest sibling, the fight for justice falls mostly on me. It is also bitter pill, because I’m certain this has contributed much to my poor health, yet I also need the money to spend on private healthcare.

And like most, I have a partner, a house, and pets that need caring for, but I have no support system. My other half and I support each other; but it doesn’t alter the fact that some of these responsibilities would be difficult for any person to juggle. Never mind that I’m also trying to fight for my health, my inheritance, run a business, maintain boundaries with all the narcissists I have had to spend a great deal of time and effort to understand that I naturally attract, maintain my sense of self, and somehow try to emerge from all this whole.

Spoiler: I probably won’t. But I try to remind myself that I would rather come out the other side of the hand I’ve been dealt with a few bruises, than to never have tried at all. Or worse; to have attempted to rely on others to play for me—because that game is a guaranteed losing hand.

#MentalHealth #IntrusiveThoughts #ChasingLife #LifeLessons #TheDisabledLife #NarcissisticPersonalityDisorder #Thoughts #MyCondition #ChronicIllness

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The ups and downs..

Wow. How life changes - day by day, hour by hour and almost minute by minute. On the up today, mostly as a result from #TheMighty - thank you! Know might not be sunshine and flowers all day - but the smallest respite is bliss. #grateful #Anxiety #Depression #LifeLessons #enjoythemoment

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You Never Know How Much You Matter To Someone That Loves You

For most of my life I've never felt like I've mattered. I was so accustomed to hearing "I love you" then being abused in some way. Those words turned empty to me. They meant "I love you so long as I can get something from you." I never really had anyone respect and acknowledge my feelings or opinions on anything either. I grew up feeling very unheard. For instance when I told a trusted adult about the abuse I was experiencing she didn't do much to stop it. It was at that moment that I felt alone.

If I couldn't confide in a trusted adult then who could I confide in? Now I know that I've accomplished a lot since speaking up about the abuse but there are times when I beat myself up and get down on myself. I have very poor self esteem. Yet people think I'm special, like I actually matter. My fiancé has had me in tears more than once (happy tears I promise) by telling me how much he loves me, how much I matter to him, how much I have influenced his life for the better. How it's better because I'm in it.

Anyone that has attempted or been on the verge of suicide like myself knows how it feels to be scared and alone. Now I don't have to feel that way anymore because I do matter. I do serve a purpose. There are people that do love, support and believe me. Even if it was after the fact.

I am so grateful for those people. This just goes to show that you never know how much you matter to someone. So when you start beating yourself up, look around and see the positive impact your life has had on others. Honestly, I need him to talk to me like that every now and again because I forget. And that's okay. You matter to others. Your life matters. People love you and believe in you. Never forget that even in your darkest moments, if you just look for the light there is always something to be grateful for. Reach out for help if you must, you can't do everything alone. He taught me a valuable lesson tonight: You never know the impact your life has on others because you don't know what they've been through. You could be that shining light for them in the darkness or they could be that for you. I am so thankful for this lesson. And you should be thankful too. You matter. Don't give up. If you are in an abusive situation, are thinking about harming yourself or suicide please reach out immediately. Everyone deserves to be safe and loved. Thanks for reading and believing in me. I believe in all of you.

#Abuse #Support #LifeLessons

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I've been thinking about this a lot

When I mean, "What is this teaching me?", I'm not talking about a short period of time, in my case, it's almost 20 years of experiences I'm sorting through. I've lived with a narcissist, my mom has mental health issues, I've had bad experiences with friends and guys, and I'm still figuring out who I am as a person among other things. Needless to say, it's frustrating. I understand that endurance and possibly being amicable in a tight spot are a couple of things I've learned, but the rest is beyond me. I'm still navigate my abandonment issues, I'm still learning to let go of some people whom I've held on for so long, and still, I'm wondering what the answers are. I know I've changed a little, but I still feel like I have a long way to go. #MentalHealth #Depression #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #LifeLessons

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Reflection #PMDD #menopause #Reflection #MentalHealth #LifeLessons

Its been almost a year since I banished her out of my life.
I cast her out like she was discarded rubbish. I often wonder if she deserved that.

Was it really that bad? Was she really that bad?

I miss her. I miss the comfort she bought. I miss her presence. The way she made me feel so in tune with my body. How she intensified every emotion I felt.
I dont want her back. She was destructive. She broke my soul with her venomous words, her twisted dreams & poisonous thoughts. I was broken when she was near.
But, I loved her. I needed her. I still need her. Without her I am not whole. Now she is gone a part of me feels lost, trapped in a bleak void forever falling further and further away from me.
The world seems scary without her. I'm not sure who I am or where I belong. Life is less colourful & more stagnant somehow.
I want to reach out to her, feel the bitter sting of her impact on my life once more.
I want to know that she is ok.

But, I know that she is ok. For she is my PMDD alter ego. I am her and she is me.

#PMDD #PremenstrualDysphoricDisorder #hormonesensitivity #MenstrationMatters #WomensHealth #mentalhealthmatters #menopause #PMDDthoughts #MentalHealth

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New Friends Destination For Current And Soon To Be New Friends! #Friends #MentalHealth

Doesn’t this image and idea look like a paradise?

Link to join us in this new adventure:

New Friends Ages 40-55ish

We all came on The Mighty ultimately to make new, real connections and to grow new friendships to get rid of this terrible thing called loneliness/being alone that is not good for anyone’s mental health and we all want better mental health.

We all want to have friendships too based on the simple fact that we are humans and humans need to feel connected to other humans.

And the twist with this group, is to all pitch in to make this a place on The Mighty where we don’t focus on our illnesses, because we are more than our illnesses, so much more. And we don’t want to forget that about ourselves. We don’t want to have our personalities get lost, all of the different, cool, unique things that make us who we are as people.

So let’s all pitch in and start just chatting about everyday stuff like you would with any friend, about life in general, sharing things about yourself- just a couple examples -your interests, something you found funny, etc., whatever you would think that this is something you would like to share with a friend, and having some fun being social- because we all know we need to really connect and keep growing new friendships with our mental health in mind.

One smile emoji or even one word can start a friendship. Some of the most comforting words in the universe are “me too.” “Hello.” “How is your day?”…(if you don’t have another conversation starter or reply to join in).

New friends can change your life and your mental health for the better.
Add in anything to get the ball rolling and grow some new friendships here.

We can’t wait to get to know You.

#Life #MightyTogether #Positivity #positive #Kind #ActsOfKindness #ActOfKindness #lonely #alone #MensHealth #MensMentalHealth #good #funny #Fun #happy #Happiness #RoomForJoy #Joy #Mindful #Mindfulness #Together #StrongerTogether #ItGetsBetter #TogetherWeAreStrongerCampaign #FamilyAndFriends #FamilyWeChoose #relate #relatable #Chat #Hope #WhatWeLoveMostAboutLife #wegotthis #NoOneFightsAlone #youmatter #Connect #Connection #SocialInteraction #social #Lifestyle #LifeLessons #Selfesteem #Selfworth #Confidence #Selflove #wellness #Health #EmotionalHealth #MentalHealthAwareness #FriendsForSurvival #TheMighty ’sMentalHealthHeroes

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Lessons we Learn

I've been in a horrible headspace lately so I thought: What is it that fibro has taught me which has helped me in life?

For me, it's slowing down and taking care of myself. I ran around like crazy, always trying to do it all, and I often neglected my own feelings and time. Now I have been forced to do something which I probably should've done a long time ago.

What positive thing has fibro brought to your life or taught you?

#Fibromyalgia #ChronicPain #LifeLessons

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Tips on how to live a fulfilled life

Here are a few tips on how to live a more fulfilled life. What do you do to fulfill your life? What tips did I miss? #livelife #fulfilled #LifeLessons #MentalHealth


Those who find a ‘why’ to live for, can bear almost any ‘how’ #Quotes #LifeLessons #Hope #Faith

What is your ‘why’? What keeps you going? What forces you to never give up? #Anxiety #Depression #PTSD #MightyTogether #MightyQuestions #Suicide #Trauma #Grief